obvious signs... not so obvious messages

Yesterday was hell on wheels. Everything went wrong all at once. I found out I didn't win the gymbird 10,000 step contest. I could handle that...no expectations. 

Then I got an email saying I didn't make it past the first interview for a job I think I'd love. Sniffle

Then, at the local grocery, my card was declined. Thank goddess for Jason, the guy behind me. He paid my tab. You rock, Jason!! You are a kind person.

At some point late in the day,  I thought about my pocket rock. I knew when I reached into my pocket, it wouldn't be there. It wasn't. What I didn't know is when I lost it. I checked my bathrobe pocket...my bedside table, the floor...no luck.

I had had that rock for quite a while. Losing it when everything was wrong made sense. It's a sign of transition...time to move on somehow. I needed to pick out a new one. 

Just days before all this mayhem, though, the signs indicated that peace and calm would exist homestead-wide, finally. I have been decluttering and cleaning the homestead. In the process, I uncovered a lot of mice and a few snakes. The place was squeaking with mice at one point so I bought a humane mouse trap and was daily taking out 2-4 mice. Some were babies and they were so freakin' cute. It was a joy to release them at the far end of the homestead.

I expected to be doing this for a long time when suddenly there were none. I haven't seen a mouse in five days. I attribute it as well to cleaning the piles of trash piled against the back of the house. 

No snakes either. I've always thought the rattler that I met in my bathroom last month had no ill intent; she could have bitten me at least three times but didn't. She did nick my foot, however, on our third encounter, and it swelled a little but I did not die and I can still walk.

So what does all this mean?  Zero mice, zero snakes and zero money. Are these things connected? Are messages being sent and received? Do I need to do anything? How do I reconcile the negative and the positive? Kind comments and suggestions welcome. 

Until next time, peace.

A Sad Goodbye

It was the last day of January 2021 when Donovan decided he was done with this world and he said farewell to it forever. I did not find out until the next morning when I looked on Facebook and saw his mother Misty's post, saying she had found his lifeless body and she couldn't breathe.

Donovan, only 18, is the grandson of my sister Tami, who passed in 2008. He is her son Damien's oldest child. I did not know Donovan very well but followed his story told by his proud, loving mom on social media. I did not realize that he was so very depressed. 

It was a Monday morning when I found out. The day was unbelievable energy-wise. Before I even got out of bed, I could tell something was up. A few minutes later, when I learned of his passing, I understood it. 

All day, I could feel Donovan everywhere. At one point, I was out pacing in the yard and the kid across the street was riding in his ATV. We both blew off steam that way during these days of Covid. We were often out at the same time but never really acknowledged each other until that Monday.

I had just reached the end of one trail the dogs and I have worn in my yard and the kid had just reached the end of his dirt drive, where he usually turned and headed back. He stopped and looked up at me. I stopped and looked up at him...and saw Donovan. Donny waved at me. I waved back. We both looked at each other for a good long moment. Goodbye. 

I continued to pace and the ATV kid continued to ride. Our eyes met and we waved several times but I did not see Donovan again. Since then, though, I feel him very much around, as he is with his mama, who has begun her journey to help others deal with mental illness. I hope to help her and support her efforts in every way I can. 

Crazy energy that day, filled with messages. The first -- that Donovan was okay. Our time on this planet is such a tiny part of our soul journey. The second -- he was saying goodbye for sure. The family that lived in the house of the ATV kid moved out that day! I'm not kidding. I had noticed less traffic there lately but didn't think they were actually moving. 

I did not see ATV Kid for a while. He's been back since but just to check on the place, I guess. He's the only one from the family who comes back. When he goes by my house, if I'm outside, he looks away, like he doesn't know me. No waves or smiles exchanged. Is there a message there? I'm thinking on it. 

Writing this post was healing for me. I deferred to Donovan once or twice, felt his loving support. Thank you, Donny, for gracing us with your loving humor and immense kindness. You weren't on this planet long but you made a positive difference to so many. I love you. 

Until next time, peace. 

 

A Conversation with Candace

I have blogged before about Candace Lord, an east mountain trance medium. I wrote about a reading she did for me with messages from my dad. Since then, I've kept in touch with her, feeling that I could learn so much from her, and she has graciously spent time with me, answering some of my questions about life as a medium and sharing her own story, which I find fascinating. She is a kindred spirit, a future dear friend, I feel. She has assured me that it works that way -- kindred spirits find each other. 

All the signs point to this friendship. Our story in many ways is similar. We are both 5s and we are both Aries. In fact, she and my baby grandson share a birthday. She was 58 when she opened her office up in Albuquerque; I am 58 now as I begin to learn, do readings and write this blog. She is kind and has a positive energy that speaks to me. She is caring and encouraging. I want to be that, too. 

One evening, Candace was explaining to me that when messages come through to her, she goes into a trance. She is called a trance medium. She crosses over to the other side for messages. She told me, too, that she has been told that sometimes when she goes into a trance, the face of the person coming through shows on her face. She said that when she was learning her craft, she attended a lot of circles. 

"The things I've seen, Michelle," she whispered. "There are many dimensions..."

It was at this moment in the conversation that Candace's voice changed slightly. It became lower, a little more gravelly. I could feel a different energy through my phone. She said, "Wait, I have a message for you. This will happen sometimes when I'm just talking like I am." She paused a moment and then, in that low voice, said, "You need to speak your truth."

I knew exactly what she was talking about. The past year has been hell and things need to be said. Tears ran down my cheeks. Wow! Since then I've been doing just that, speaking my truth. It's only been a couple of days but it seems like since then, things have taken a turn for the better. 

The last few days, I've been thinking about myself when I was younger. I am an Aries but through young adulthood, I was not a typical one. I was not cheerful, motivated and confident. I was not a leader. I was incredibly shy and anxious. I was severely depressed. 

Now I think I'm very Aries. What is up with that? I feel like there was past life stuff going on...

I'll let you know what I find out. Until next time, peace. 

Exploring My Life Path Number

I talked about my visit to Abq medium Candace Lord in an earlier post. She had asked me my birth date and did some calculating to determine my life path number, which turned out to be 5, the same as Candace. I decided to look more into what it meant to be a 5, and this is what I found. 

Number 5's:

• have lots of energy
• need change/stimulation
• are always up for an adventure
• are loyal but can be thoughtless and selfish
• need change 
• need freedom
• flit from job to job
• do best in jobs like consulting or owning own business
• can be dedicated and focused if they put their minds to it
• are adaptable, smart, progressive
• have a tolerant nature
• often trust the wrong people
• are a poor judge of character
• are drawn to eccentric, unstable people
• desire for instant gratification is their downfall
• discipline and stable family life helps

I do have to admit some of that list is true -- the good stuff. The bad, not so much. Kidding. It is interesting to look at our personalities in terms of numbers. Are Candace and I similar in personality? Would the fact that we are both 5's be apparent? Would we work well together?

Find out, if you haven't already, what your life path number is and its characteristics, and learn a little bit more about yourself. 

A short post this time; numbers speak faster than words. Until next time, peace. 

A Visit from Dad

In the past five years or so, as I've been on this spiritual journey, my mom has visited often from the other side. She has given me guidance and reassurance. Love you, miss you, Mom.

My dad died seven years before Mom but I'm not sure that I ever really felt his presence as I do hers, at least not until this last year. My son has been getting into Subarus, a favorite of my dad, and as Daniel has been acquiring and working on old Subarus, I have felt Dad watching over him and approving.

That feeling was confirmed by Candace Lord, an east mountain medium I met with recently. As we settled down for my reading, she mentioned that a man with a version of the name James and the name Fred was present. My dad's name is Jimmy Fred McClary.

She asked if he likes cars because he was telling her to tell me that I need balance, like a good car, to run well. He then talked about an unfortunate situation I was in at home. He told me that I am climbing a mountain and will be able to see the big picture when I reach the top, which should be around March.

He said I had done all I could and had to let them do it on their own (being vague to protect privacy) and when a certain someone reaches the age of 27, he will also better see the big picture. This meant so much to me. Spirit knows what we need to hear.

At some point in the reading, Candace looked directly at me and said, "You want to do what I do, don't you?"

"Yeah, I do," I replied. I want to be a spiritual medium someday.

"You can do it," she said, "In fact, you are better at it than you think." She rubbed her nose, saying that the action was her sign that this was true. She also did a quick tally of what my number is and we discovered that she and I are both 5s. I determined to look into this more later...still need to.

Dad said goodbye with what Candace saw as a row of x's and o's written in his precise, tiny handwriting. He had excellent handwriting skills. He was a computer guy, after all. Love you, miss you, Dad.

Our session time up, Candace referred me to Marya O'Malley, who can help mentor me into mediumship, and she gave me a link to a guided 10-minute positive chakra meditation. I left feeling great.

Till next time.

Nourishing my chakras

It's been only a week or so since I began doing a 10-minute guided chakra meditation but wow! I'm beginning to feel balanced and more positive about things. Once I decided that I was not going to stress about whether I was meditating correctly or not, that I was just going to start doing it and see where it went, it has become an enjoyable part of my day that I look forward to.

Like a lot of people, my first concern about meditating was that I wouldn't be able to still my mind long enough to get any benefit from it. That was my only concern, to be honest. And it turned out to be true -- my mind sometimes won't find calm. Rather than fight it, I decided to go with it. I just let those random thoughts flow but I slow them down and take a look at them as they think their way through my mind. I also try to pull myself back to the words the guide speaks and learn more about chakras.

After a couple of days of doing this meditation, I could tell which chakras needed nourishment. Definitely, my root chakra was the most deprived. How did I know this? I didn't. I just felt it.

I could easily envision the color red and its nourishing, healing energy entering with my breath near the base of my spine, and my racing mind stilled as I was guided through this part of the meditation.

It makes sense. The past year has been tumultuous. I felt alienated from my family and friends. I had problems making ends meet financially. I felt like I was being pushed out of my own home. I was angry and hurt most of the year.

When the soothing guide on the video told me to reach down, down into the earth, I felt at home. I felt calm, stable, and centered. I belonged.

Another thing I assumed about meditation was that I needed to set the stage before meditating. I guess that's true but I don't schedule it at a specific time. I just get settled into my day, smudge, make some tea, listen to the early morning news, and brush my teeth. I let the dogs out and wait for them to return before settling into a comfortable position to meditate, usually within the first half hour of getting up each morning.

My favorite part of the meditation is near the end of the meditation when the guide tells us to bathe the crown chakra with warm golden light. Just feels good.

Try it yourself if you haven't already and let me know what you think.

Until next time. Peace.

Witchy wisdom

I'm learning so much on my journey to become a psychic medium. When I first started this blog, it was the memes and other posts of witches and mediums on Facebook that I first connected with and learned from, people like the Sage Lady and Wayward Witch.

At about the same time, I was making connections with people on social media that felt deeper than just making new online friends. Some were people I had known in the past in some way, like one who was a student at the high school where I first taught in Tohatchi a long, long time ago. I am so old.

I had intended to blog about each person who has influenced me so far and how they have influenced me but there are so many. As I listed under each name the things I have learned, I realized that almost everyone on my list was sending out similar messages and lessons. That's why I decided instead to organize my thoughts as to the --

Messages received and lessons learned

The main message I received from many is that I need to slow down and achieve balance. I've been "stirring the pot" and now I need to step back and let the flavors simmer. I need to find calm for myself.

Recommendations to accomplish this include holding onto some calming blue chalcedony, practicing daily 10-minute chakra balancing meditation, conducting a bowl burning ceremony to release negative energy/let things go, and learning to immerse myself in the moment.

Another common message was that change is coming, good change, and it might happen quickly. I'm headed down paths unknown but Spirit will be with me. All I have to do is picture it happening and it will. Life is speeding up but I need to maintain calm from within.
 

So what am I doing?

I'm blogging, first and foremost, which is a grounding activity for me.

I walk whenever possible, even if it's only through the supermarket. You can get some good walking in at Smith's.

I have an acre of land and I will also "pace" in the front yard, simply walking back and forth along this little path the dogs have made. The fresh air is cleansing.

As I pace, I chant, asking Spirit to send me "positive energy, love and light; healing energy, love and light; and calming energy, love and light." Sometimes I talk to myself, planning out loud my day.

I smudge a lot, sometimes multiple times a day, and I continue to add crystals and rocks to my collection. I love to make rock arrangements with them, very calming.

I've also recently begun doing a 10-minute meditation when I feel the need. It often happens that, when I first begin the meditation, I almost stop because I feel like I'm too nervous but then I concentrate on the guide's voice and it all comes together. Each time, I'm able to calm down a little quicker. It helps me get off to a good start to the day.

I continue to pay attention to my mentors and ask questions. I love what I'm learning so far. What I appreciate most about almost all of what I've learned is the positivity and love shared among these special people. Thank you.

Until next time. Peace.